3 Ways to End a Long Term Relationship - wikiHow
When couples break up after a long-term relationship, the reason is most often You have to see it this way: this breakup will be a catalyst for a better life (and a. Are you one-half of a couple that's just not working? Learn about how to end a long-term relationship the right way. If you don't know what to watch out for, or how to prevent a problem, some problems can So, the more you know about these fight-inducing, LTR-ruining problems, the better. And, sadly, a long-term relationship can end.
Be realistic Always be realistic in your relationship. Even if this relationship is not what you want, it can be difficult to leave someone familiar for the unknown. Have realistic expectations for how the breakup will play out to be best prepared for the moment it ends. Plan it out Choose the right spot to break off the relationship.
Hopefully this one is obvious, but never, never, never end a long-term relationship over the phone, email, text, Snapchat, sticky note, and so on you get the idea.
Have the courage to face your partner.
How to end a relationship confidently and gracefully, and leave with dignity
Remain calm Stay calm when talking to your partner. Wait until you are calm before you have the conversation. Out of respect for each other, you should end a long-term relationship gracefully. There should be no yelling or blaming. Be calm and reasonable in your manner and with your words. Honesty wins Always be honest. Maybe you wanted different things from life, or maybe the physical connection was lacking. I can understand that it's much more comfortable to pretend it's all going to be okay.
You might just find it excruciating to think of your partner being upset, or to see it happening. Particularly if you feel that you're the cause of the pain.
However, I know that you can manage it, if you prepare yourself well before the start of the emotional roller-coaster Should you stay or walk away? This test will help you to think through what's wrong and what's still right in your relationship.
You may find that there's still hope of recovery - or discover that it really is time to go your own way. Do you think or hope there is still a chance that the two of you could work it out and avoid a breakup?
Then get my Loving Communication Kit for Couples. The kit contains a bundle of action-packed, solution-focussed, relationship saving tools. Watch the video If you haven't already watched this video at the start of this article, do watch it now for some immediate tips Are you prepared for the breakup?
Are you really, really sure you want to break up? Yes No Have the two of you done all you can to save the relationship? For example, have you used my Communication Kit for Happy Couples? Yes No Have you been for relationship counselling together or had relationship counselling online assuming you're not in an abusive relationship?
Yes Have you talked to your partner about your doubts? Yes No Have you taken responsibility for your part in the downturn of your relationship and worked hard to make amends? Yes No Have you been faithful unless the two of you had an agreement about having other liaisons.?
Yes Have you treated your partner as you hope to be treated yourself? Yes No Have you had some personal counselling to talk through what's going on for you, or for advice about ending your relationship? Yes No Have you invested sufficient time and effort in this relationship - enjoyed the ups and worked through the downs?
Yes Click here to get your results below Your score is: Well, the more thoughtless the ending From my professional experience You won't need to commit to weekly sessions, you could just have a few online, WhatsApp, or email conversations. I promise you, it can make all the difference. For further information, see my page: Relationship Breaking up Advice. How to end a long term relationship: Hopefully, you'll also have read my article When to break up your relationship.
This means that come what may, you're mentally prepared to stay calm and polite. Act in the way you'd have wanted your partner to behave if they were the one breaking up with you - however difficult your partner may make it for you.
I promise you, if you need to engage a solicitor, that second step will help keep your costs down. You won't be creating another layer of conflict on top of the one you're already dealing with. For help choosing the right lawyer see my article: How to Find a Lawyer Even if splitting up is unlikely to be amicable for whatever reasonyou may just manage a reasonable ending. You'll feel better for it and it may also help your partner to get over the ending sooner I hope that still matters to you, if only a little.
If you have children, the whole drama will be so much more manageable for them if the two of you can at the very least talk politely. Do all you can to stay as calm as possible. Stay in touch with family and friends and take time out for yourself to help you relax.
How to end a relationship without causing unnecessary pain and bitterness It's very easy to make an already difficult situation even more unmanageable by doing any of the following: Putting the ending off when you really know you want to leave the relationship - sadly it just isn't going to be any easier a month or a year later.
It's unlikely that there's ever going to be a 'good' time for this type of ending. Of course, there could be a really bad time - for example in the middle of a major crisis.
Try to calmly think through why exactly you've been putting it off and take a problem-solving approach to each reason or 'excuse' you come up with. Deliberately making life miserable and as difficult as possible in the hope that your partner says he or she no longer loves you and wants to end the relationship. This would only add another layer of problems and stress on top of what you're dealing with already.
9 Crucial Steps to Ending a Long-Term Relationship
Ending a long term relationship this way would leave you both with a very bitter taste in your mouth. Starting an affair The pain this causes should not be underestimated. Again, it just adds more problems and distress. Ultimately your adultery could cause a great deal of trauma to all involved - not just your partner.
If you want to be able to end your relationship as well as you can, then you'll need to end the affair - at least until you've dealt with the ending of your marriage or relationship See my article: Avoiding any conversation about the problems in your relationship or marriage may result in your partner making assumptions.BESTMANMADE: 6 Ways to End a LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP
He or she will be desperately trying to figure out what's going on. You could be suspected of having an affaireven if there is no infidelity. Of course, if you are having an affair, I can understand you won't want to talk.
9 Crucial Steps to Ending a Long-Term Relationship
However, you're only prolonging the agony if deep down you know you want to finish your primary relationship. Packing your bags and disappearing No further explanation is needed here. Holding on to anger and resentment costs too much precious energy When and how not to end a long-term relationship Avoid causing more hassle, pain and a potentially longer lasting and more expensive process.
Take heed of the following advice I may earn a commission from BetterHelp.
Don't end a relationship during a telephone conversation. Don't leave a voicemail with either a hint or a clear message about ending. Don't let someone else do the dirty job for you.
Don't deliver the message in a public place. Ending a relationship in a public place should only be an option if you're worried about abuse see my article: Signs of an abusive relationship Don't tell friends, family members or colleagues you're ending your relationship or marriage before you tell your partner or spouse that it's over.
Don't end the relationship during a row - your partner may actually be pleased - it may be what she or he was hoping for! Don't write it online in any shape or form - email, Facebook status update or any other way.
Don't give any kind of ultimatum. Breaking up an intimate relationship is never going to be easy. So I'm afraid there's no point thinking you can 'just do it' without causing any pain.